higante’s

after our class in feasibility study, we will go to angono to our friend’s house to celebrate their town’s fiesta, we waited for everyone to get ready, when all was set up , ruey passed us by and told us to wait for him he’ll just get his things ready. lee ren then walked out cause this will have to make her wait a little longer, she said she had to hurry home so that she’ll be allowed by her mom to join us. we then followed her knowing that she’s not the type you want to have an arguement with, poor ruey ^_^

we then went to the lrt station. we’re waiting for the train when another classmate arrives, the one who’s the reason for making this blogsite, the subject for most of my entry, the one i love. as she walks toward us i dont know how to project my face, im experiencing emotional disturbance again, mixed feelings. so we ride the train, they talked about the feasibility class, until the conversation went to our chatting last night, im not really listening to them but then i hear my name, jhouana said “magka chat din kami ni lean kagabi” she then replied “naka chat ko rin YAN”. damn. i hate it when i turn out to be the subject of “improper pronoun” she could said “nagkachat din KAMI” or ” nakachat ko rin SYA” but “YAN” is the term she used. that word is oftenly use as a pronoun of things.. NON LIVING THINGS, that word makes me feel im meaningless to her. it’s just a small thing anyway of improper use of pronoun, but then again small things can hurt. so i remained silent as i view her reflection on the train door, i watch her through fading images that is reflected by the train door, i watch her talk, watch her smile, watch her move, im starting to love her again, but then again the feeling of non existing to her kills me. so i went to the other side of the train and sit until we arrived at the last station..

we left the station, and wait for a jeepney ride to angono, the disturbance is raging, im really not feeling better, nostalgia i think, ive been to this place before. so we walk again hoping that a jeep who’s seat is enough would pass us by, i look at her more often, she stay behind one of my friends, as if she’s hiding, may be for me not to see her, knowing her, there were times she’ll put her bag on top of the table to block my sight of her, maybe im the only one who notice, may be it was unintentional, whatever it may seems.. we then decided to take a ride to sta lucia, we are sitting at the jeep when melvin goes to where leeren is sitting, leaving a gap between her and me, i should have sit by her side but i think that would make her feel unease, whatever.

we’ll take another jeepney ride, we’re at sta lucia east grandmall damn. everything moves in slow motion, we take a ride, i found myself looking at her seriously. i dont know but maybe she understand what my eyes are telling, that i still love her. she then leave, went home. the rest of us then are having a funny conversation, though it take some time before i join them, we talked about ruey we mock him in our stories only to be found out that he’s riding the same jeep with us, he’s sitting on the front.

we then arrived at jhouana’s place, we watch a ball game and i lost a bet of 20 bucks, we then eat, after the long hours of travelling we are finally eating, i think i eat a lot, i have some rice left in my plate and i go to the kitchen to get some lumpia when leeren take my plate and remove the plastic cover with my rice on it, i guess dinner is over. we then prepare ourselves cause we’ll go somewhere in the town.

we then go to the plaza, as we walk there were fireworks display and it was so near that you can see the whole picture, i then think of her, what if things turns out the opposite, may be she’s with me now as i walk toward the plaza, her hand in mine as we take a look at something that the festival offers.. i continue walking, we pass by different stalls, they bought zodiac keychain with their name imprint on it, it doesnt appeal much to me so i didnt buy one, maybe because i dont believe in zodiac signs, or maybe because i think it’s just a waste of money, it was a nice souvenir though. we explore the place and then decided to go home. on the way home we bought a bottle of liquor, i like to drink, not because of what happened earlier but because if i didnt choose to be with them ill still be drinking on a party somewhere else.   

bedtime. we’re on a room. the three of us drink the liquor. we share some stories most of them are nonsense i wont even try to remember, the others are doing the same, telling stories of the ones who seem to be the subject of their hate, all their complaints and reaction about someone who’s not there with us were gathered on that very room. it made me think, we do the same with my other circle of friends, we talk about someone who’s not there with us, we share all our reaction toward someone, in short, “napapagusapan ang wala”. i then sleep for about two hours.  

we get up at 5, we have to go to the mass which start at 6, we didnt make it on time though, we arrived there at about 8 i think. this is the main event of the feast, the higante’s. there were plenty of people, i notice something, most of them have personalized tshirts as an indication of the “social group” they belong. some are taking peoples attention by the way they dress, some are even drinking beer while on the parade, some are high on drugs. some picked up fights, we all get wet as the celebration continues. people are watering each other, ice cold water, urinated water, water from canal, alcoholic water. this is done to give thanks and acknowledge san clemente the town’s patron, it made me think again, why not thank God instead. and for me, why did i joined anyway, well im here to witness the town’s culture and to enjoy but not to worship the saint.. it was all fun after all, it was memorable experience.. its time to go home.

personal postscript:

ang hirap magsulat sa english, mali mali yung grammar at nagigiing boring basahin.